Learning steadfastness, Strength and Sabrun Jameel from Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ
– Atoofa Nasiha
My Dear Allah,
I feel like I had everything and was close to achieving what seemed within reach, yet it slipped away as if it never existed. Why did that happen? If it was never meant for me, why did I feel such a loss? I feel like I’ve tried my best, yet everything seems to be falling apart. No matter how hard I work, the outcomes never match my hopes, and my heart grows heavy with disappointment. I thought I understood Your plan, but now I question everything.
Sometimes I wonder if I am capable, if I have the strength to keep moving forward. I feel exhausted from constantly trying and yet seeing no results. My mind feels like a fog; there is no space to think, work, or act, and even questioning anything feels tiring.
Still, I turn to You, because I know every setback has meaning, even when I cannot see it. Help me to remain patient, to trust Your wisdom, and to find hope even when all seems lost. Guide me to see that failure is not the end, but a chance to grow closer to You and to learn lessons I could never grasp on my own.
We often hear, “Patience is the key, and Allah’s plan is always the best,” yet when failure stares us in the face, it is hard to feel that truth in our hearts. We imagine we understand how things should happen, we plan, we hope, and yet life takes a different turn. Every loss, every unexpected outcome, feels like a personal defeat, and our minds spiral into doubt and exhaustion.
By nature, we focus more on what went wrong than on what could still go right. We resist hardship and struggle, yet we long for immediate success and recognition for our efforts. When outcomes don’t match our hopes, it shakes our confidence and clouds our thinking.
If you read through the Qur’an, you’ll notice how Prophet Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ faced similar moments. He watched his children disappear from his life and was left in deep sorrow, yet he remained firm on his path because he embraced “Beautiful Patience.” Through the epitome of sabr, tawakkul, and steadfast prayer, he found solace and guidance from Allah. He was one of the prophets who was tested with longing. Let’s explore how Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ acquired strength through years of beautiful patience.
How Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ Found Strength Through Beautiful Patience
Prophet Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ was blessed with a large and noble family. He had twelve sons, and his household was filled with the blessings of a prophet’s lineage. Among them, Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ stood out as a beloved son and also as one chosen by Allah for prophethood. Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ recognised Yusuf’s عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ special status through the dream Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ shared, a dream that hinted at a significant future ordained by Allah. From that moment, Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ became the apple of Yaqub’s عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ eye, cherished among his sons. But as with all prophets, Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ was tested, and his patience was challenged in ways that would demonstrate the depth of his Imaan.
His Reaction to Yusuf’s عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ Dream
Now, if you and I have Tawakkulillah that loves what gives pleasure to Allah, we’d be humbled by the thought that every blessing can turn into a test and every test can turn into a blessing.
And children are one of the greatest blessings and tests for every parent, isn’t it?
The Qur’an narrates how Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ responded to Yusuf’s عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ dream:
قَالَ يَـٰبُنَىَّ لَا تَقْصُصْ رُءْيَاكَ عَلَىٰٓ إِخْوَتِكَ فَيَكِيدُوا۟ لَكَ كَيْدًا ۖ إِنَّ ٱلشَّيْطَـٰنَ لِلْإِنسَـٰنِ عَدُوٌّۭ مُّبِينٌۭ
His father said: “My son! Do not relate your dream to your brothers lest they hatch a plot to harm you. Indeed Satan is man’s open enemy. (12:5)
Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ advised Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ in order to protect the bond between siblings from misunderstanding and envy. He knew that jealousy could arise from the assumption that Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ was loved more than the others. He recognised that this feeling was fuelled by Shaitan, who he rightly called an open enemy to mankind. Despite the warnings, the sons of Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ became the prey to Shaitan’s trap. They plotted, faked the death of Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, and brought the blood-stained shirt to Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ.
His Response to Yusuf’s عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ Brothers
And see what kept Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ so firm after seeing the shirt of Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, he further said,
وَجَآءُو عَلَىٰ قَمِيصِهِۦ بِدَمٍۢ كَذِبٍۢ ۚ قَالَ بَلْ سَوَّلَتْ لَكُمْ أَنفُسُكُمْ أَمْرًۭا ۖ فَصَبْرٌۭ جَمِيلٌۭ ۖ وَٱللَّهُ ٱلْمُسْتَعَانُ عَلَىٰ مَا تَصِفُونَ
And they brought Yusuf’s shirt, stained with false blood. Seeing this, their father exclaimed: “Nay (this is not true); rather your evil souls have made it easy for you to commit a heinous act. So, I will bear this patiently, and in good grace. It is Allah’s help alone that I seek against your fabrication.” (12:18)
He knew that they had done wrong, their souls had fallen so low to commit such an act. But what Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ found really comforting? It was Patience and he considered Allah as the only help.
His Response to the Brothers About Binyamin
Years later, when the brothers requested to take Binyamin with them, Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ felt the same of fear but they took him anyway. And then what happened? Binyamin and the older brother had to stay in the market place under the accusation of theft which was a plan of Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ. What did Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ respond when he realised this?
قَالَ بَلْ سَوَّلَتْ لَكُمْ أَنفُسُكُمْ أَمْرًۭا ۖ فَصَبْرٌۭ جَمِيلٌ ۖ عَسَى ٱللَّهُ أَن يَأْتِيَنِى بِهِمْ جَمِيعًا ۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلْعَلِيمُ ٱلْحَكِيمُ
The father heard the narration and said: “(All that is untrue). But your souls have made it easy for you to engage in a heinous act. So, I will be graciously patient even at this. Allah may well bring them all back to me. He is All-Knowing, All-Wise.” (12:83)
Doesn’t this confession sound similar? Re-read the ayah (12:18)
12:18 and 12:83 intentionally sound similar, and that repetition forges something wonderful.
In both moments, Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ is facing a painful loss – first Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, then Binyamin. In both, his sons come with an excuse, and he responds almost the same way: “Your souls have enticed you to something, so patience is most fitting.”
He didn’t question Allah’s Qadr, he didn’t collapse into confusion and turned his way from Allah even when his own sons and people started telling him that waiting for Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ is just an illusion and that he is daydreaming but what did he confess to his sons?
قَالَ إِنَّمَآ أَشْكُوا۟ بَثِّى وَحُزْنِىٓ إِلَى ٱللَّهِ وَأَعْلَمُ مِنَ ٱللَّهِ مَا لَا تَعْلَمُونَ
“He said: “I will address my sorrow and grief only to Allah, and I know from Allah what you do not know.” (12:86)
“I know from Allah that which you do not know” means Allah knows what He is doing and Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ trusted on it with beautiful patience. He had the immense Tawakkul that Allah was doing something beyond their knowledge, and he firmly stated that he only complains about his suffering to Allah and no one else.
The Reunion with Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ
The moment of union after years of longing finally arrives. Even from a distance of hundreds of miles, Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ felt Yusuf’s عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ presence:
وَلَمَّا فَصَلَتِ ٱلْعِيرُ قَالَ أَبُوهُمْ إِنِّى لَأَجِدُ رِيحَ يُوسُفَ ۖ لَوْلَآ أَن تُفَنِّدُونِ
And as the caravan set out (from Egypt), their father said (in Canaan): “Indeed I smell the fragrance of Yusuf. I say so although you may think that I am doting.” (12:94)
That’s how strong the bond was, that’s how Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ and Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ were connected even when they were apart for so many years. They could sense each other’s presence.
فَلَمَّا دَخَلُوا۟ عَلَىٰ يُوسُفَ ءَاوَىٰٓ إِلَيْهِ أَبَوَيْهِ وَقَالَ ٱدْخُلُوا۟ مِصْرَ إِن شَآءَ ٱللَّهُ ءَامِنِينَ
And when they went to Yusuf, he took his parents aside and said (to the members of his family): “Enter the city now, and if Allah wills, you shall be secure.” (12:99)
وَرَفَعَ أَبَوَيْهِ عَلَى ٱلْعَرْشِ وَخَرُّوا۟ لَهُۥ سُجَّدًۭا ۖ وَقَالَ يَـٰٓأَبَتِ هَـٰذَا تَأْوِيلُ رُءْيَـٰىَ مِن قَبْلُ قَدْ جَعَلَهَا رَبِّى حَقًّۭا ۖ وَقَدْ أَحْسَنَ بِىٓ إِذْ أَخْرَجَنِى مِنَ ٱلسِّجْنِ وَجَآءَ بِكُم مِّنَ ٱلْبَدْوِ مِنۢ بَعْدِ أَن نَّزَغَ ٱلشَّيْطَـٰنُ بَيْنِى وَبَيْنَ إِخْوَتِىٓ ۚ إِنَّ رَبِّى لَطِيفٌۭ لِّمَا يَشَآءُ ۚ إِنَّهُۥ هُوَ ٱلْعَلِيمُ ٱلْحَكِيمُ
And after they had entered the city, Yusuf raised his parents to the throne beside himself, and they (involuntarily) bowed in prostration before him.2 Joseph said: “Father! This is the fulfilment of the vision I had before – one that My Lord has caused to come true. He was kind to me when He rescued me from the prison, and brought you from the desert after Satan had stirred discord between me and my brothers. Certainly my Lord is Subtle in the fulfilment of His will; He is All-Knowing, All-Wise. (12:100)
The moment after Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ reunited with Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, both of them did not talk about how much they suffered or how helpless they once felt. They did not victimise themselves for the test that came from Allah. Instead, they looked at how beautifully it all ended. The dream came true. The story that began with a dream concluded with its interpretation. They did not dwell on the sons who went astray because they knew it was part of the test written for them and chose to forgive and move forward.
As Allah beautifully asks us,
وَجَعَلْنَا بَعْضَكُمْ لِبَعْضٍۢ فِتْنَةً أَتَصْبِرُونَ ۗ وَكَانَ رَبُّكَ بَصِيرًۭا
We made some of you a means to test each by the other to see whether you remain patient. Your Lord is All-Seeing. (25:20)
When we connect and reflect upon all these verses, we understand why Allah chose Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ and Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ as Prophets because He knew that these two men, the father and the son, would remain firm in faith, resilient, and steady in their imaan and in everything they did. While Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ found strength through Beautiful Patience during his years of longing, Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ also endured his own suffering and challenges. Both of them passed test after test through the way of صَبْرٌۭ جَمِيلٌۭ (Beautiful Patience). Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ lost his beloved sons, faced loneliness, and endured the pain of waiting for years, yet his hope in Allah never faded. Through every trial, he turned his sorrow into dua and his silence into trust. These verses show that patience is not passive; it is active trust – a steady belief that Allah’s plan is always coming together in ways we cannot yet see. When Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ was finally reunited with Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, it was not just a moment of joy but a lesson that no pain goes unseen and no tear is wasted when borne with faith. And that is why Allah refers to the story of Yaqub and Yusuf as Ahsan al-Qasas – the best of stories mentioned in the Qur’an. Truly, Allah’s promise is real, and His timing is always perfect.
And we all know how Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ cried so much, yearning for Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ all those years, that it made him blind. With this much sensitivity, any normal human would have lost his mind. But how did patience become Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ’s only remedy for healing? Let’s see what modern studies say.
What modern science says about patience as a source of strength
Patience acts like an emotion regulation strategy that helps the mind cope with delays, uncertainty, and loss. Recent psychological work reframes patience not as passive resignation but as a set of active strategies people use when they face waiting or setbacks. In practice, patience reduces the urge to react impulsively and gives the brain time to shift from immediate emotion to considered response.¹
Learning to be patient strengthens mental health and daily functioning. Research shows that higher trait patience correlates with lower depression and greater life satisfaction. People who cultivate patience report better self-control, less rumination, and clearer decision making under stress. These outcomes explain why patience is linked to improved relationships and goal attainment.²
Patience improves stress tolerance and resilience. Several empirical studies find a positive relationship between patience, resilience, and the ability to tolerate hardship. In high-stress settings, such as healthcare or crisis conditions, individuals with greater patience show less burnout and better emotional recovery. This suggests patience functions as a buffer that protects mental resources when adversity mounts.³
Neuroscience and physiology help explain the mechanism. When people use patient strategies – reframing the situation, delaying immediate action, and engaging in calm problem solving – areas of the prefrontal cortex involved in emotional regulation engage more strongly, which downregulates reactive limbic responses. Over time, these practices reduce stress hormone reactivity and improve physiological markers such as heart rate variability. In short, patient habits change how the brain and body respond to pressure.⁴
Islamic scholarship complements these findings with spiritual framing and practical steps. Classical and contemporary scholars describe beautiful patience, sabr jameel, as an active stance: outward endurance combined with inward trust and action. Research and resources from Muslim scholarship and institutes such as Yaqeen connect the Qur’anic ideal of patient surrender with modern psychological tools for resilience. Practically this means combining dua, sustained prayer, wise planning, and mental framing to make patience an applied skill rather than passive waiting.⁵
Relating to Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ
Relating these scientific insights to the story of Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, we understand that patience is not only a spiritual virtue but also a form of emotional regulation that protects the mind during long-term distress. Studies in psychology describe patience as an active process that reduces anxiety and supports clear thinking by engaging the brain’s prefrontal cortex, the region responsible for self-control and long-term perspective. Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ spent years in sorrow, yet his consistent faith and restraint prevented despair from overtaking him. Modern research confirms that when people practice hope and emotional endurance, they maintain healthier stress levels and recover faster from grief. Just like Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ transformed pain into prayer, this balance between patience and faith gives the human mind strength to heal, refocus, and find meaning in hardship.
Lessons from the Qur’an and Modern Study on Finding Strength through Patience
Learn to calm the storm within
When life feels heavy and emotions rise, remember how Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ stayed composed even when grief surrounded him. He cried, yes, but he never let sorrow control his heart. Staying calm is not about ignoring pain; it is about managing it with faith. Modern research too says that those who pause, breathe, and wait through challenges make better decisions and recover faster from stress.
Give yourself the time to understand what Allah is teaching you
Every delay, every unanswered dua, holds a lesson. Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ didn’t know when or how Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ would return, but he trusted that Allah’s wisdom was greater than his understanding. Sometimes what feels like silence from Allah is actually preparation. Studies in psychology also suggest that when people accept uncertainty calmly, their minds stay clearer and their hope stronger.
Let your pain take you closer to Allah, not farther
Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ cried until he lost his sight, yet never turned his pain into complaint. He used grief as a means of connection with Allah. That’s a reminder that when you feel helpless, turn your tears into dua. Modern studies find that those who give meaning to their pain through faith or purpose experience healing more deeply.
Choose hope when you cannot see the outcome
Imagine the years Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ spent waiting without a sign of Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ. Still, he said, “I know from Allah what you do not know.” Hope kept him alive. Hope keeps us alive too. Faith teaches us that waiting is not wasted time; it is the moment Allah watches who trusts Him most.
Be gentle with people even when they wrong you
Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ did not raise his voice or curse his sons, even after their betrayal. He still prayed for them. That is the real strength of a believer, to forgive when the heart burns with hurt. Studies show that forgiveness relieves mental burden and restores emotional balance. Islam already taught this centuries ago: those who forgive are honoured in the sight of Allah.
Trust that nothing you bear is unnoticed
Every tear Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ shed was seen by Allah. Every quiet prayer was heard. What came after, the reunion, the healing, the joy, was a reminder that no pain stays forever. Allah’s plan may not come early, but it never comes late. This is what science calls resilience, but what believers know as tawakkul: complete trust in Allah’s plan.
Remember that peace follows patience
When Yaqub عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ was reunited with Yusuf عَلَيْهِ ٱلسَّلَامُ, his first words were gratitude, not complaint. He looked back and saw that everything painful led to something good. That’s how life works; peace comes after the test. Both the Qur’an and modern study remind us that calm hearts are those that wait with faith and accept with grace.
Dua For Seeking Patience and Perseverance
رَبَّنَآ أَفْرِغْ عَلَيْنَا صَبْرًۭا وَتَوَفَّنَا مُسْلِمِينَ
Our Lord! Shower us with perseverance and cause us to die as those who have submitted [to You].’
(Surah Al-A’raf 7:126)
References:
- Sweeny, K. (2024). On (Im)Patience: A New Approach to an Old Virtue. Personality and Social Psychology Review. https://www.katesweeny.com/uploads/2/6/9/4/26944848/sweeny_2024__pspr_.pdf
- Castro, J. A., et al. (2012). An Examination of Patience and Well-Being. The Journal of Positive Psychology, Taylor & Francis Online. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/17439760.2012.697185
- Al-Salem, A., et al. (2023). Patience and Stress Tolerance in High-Stress Environments. Frontiers in Psychology. https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2023.1059589/full
- Yale Center for Faith & Culture. (2022). Neuroscience Insights on Mindfulness, Patience, and Emotional Regulation. https://faith.yale.edu/media/the-psychology-of-patience
- Yaqeen Institute. (2021). When Our Worlds Are Shaken: Finding Strength in Beautiful Patience. https://yaqeeninstitute.org/read/paper/when-our-worlds-are-shaken-finding-strength-in-beautiful-patience
